One day your heart will take you to your lover.
One day your soul will carry you to the Beloved.
Don’t get lost in your pain –
Know that one day your pain will become your cure.
There is startling truth in this Rumi’s poem. This is exactly my experience of overcoming chronic fatigue syndrome. There was a lot of pain, an immense amount of suffering underneath the symptoms of CFS. Our natural reaction to pain is to shun it, ignore it or suppress it. That’s what I tried to do too for about 13 years. But it never worked. No matter how hard I tried to ignore and suppress my feelings and emotions, they still kept making themselves known in a major way in my daily life. It was not until I started to pay attention to how I feel that healing started to happen.
The truth is that the day your pain will become your cure can be here and now. The trick is the acceptance of symptoms – a truthful and humble acknowledgement about your present state of health (and mind).
Once you are open and willing to see what exactly is going on with you, your pain will become your cure.
I really have not much more to say than this simple truth. I’m only finding new ways of saying it.
Surely, feeling the horrible symptoms is the last thing a person who’s suffering from CFS wants to do. “Looking into my symptoms, feeling them fully? No, that you!! I’d rather take my painkillers and wait until the pain subsides!” might be a common internal dialogue in people with chronic fatigue syndrome. It is understandable, but not effective. How will you ever expect to regain your health if you keep taking pills and ignoring what’s really happening? This is a strategy of escape, of hiding your head in the sand. I guess my role is to disappoint you and say it will never work.
One day your pain will become your cure…
LOOK, just look inside of yourself! What are you feeling? What kind of thoughts are running through your mind? What kind of sensations do you feel in your body? Do you remember the time you first started to experience symptoms? Your first brain fog, fatigue, excessive need for sleep… when was that and what was happening in your life at the time or prior to that? Those are the questions to ask. Keep looking, observing, feeling. Then your pain will become your cure. It will guide you right into the middle of your pain where the truth about your illness is stored. Be ready to go there and see. The answer is within. Don’t look at doctors and professionals, look inside! The answer has been waiting for you right there all along. You just haven’t paid attention. Instead, your attention has been diverted by medication, TV, entertainment, socializing, etc. Eventually you must turn your eyes inward to get the answers you need. And then your pain will become your cure.
I am aware that the above may sound like an accusation. It is not intended and I apologize if I hurt you. Also, it may sound easy to do. I’m afraid I’m gonna have to disappoint to you again and say it’s not gonna be easy. In fact, it can be one of the most difficult things you’ve ever done. Unless you can easily put up with intense suffering for months on end, of course.
Chronic Fatigue Syndrome is a really difficult condition to overcome, but I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again – it is possible to overcome CFS for good! If you just let your pain become your cure…